Slanket Taste on a Snuggie Budget

Posted by: Hope on July 28th, 2009

A man walked into a bar and caused mass hysteria. He was not a celebrity, he was not attractive, he did not appear to rolling in hundos, and yet the ladies were throwing their selves at him. They each took turns posing for photos cuddled under his fleeced arm. It was not his Axe body spray which drew them near. It was his SNUGGIE! The phenomenon has spread far and wide. Gothamist eagerly counted down to the New York City Snuggie Pub Crawl. NYC was not the only major metropolitan area to highlight this glorious blanket. Many US major cities have organized similar Snuggie celebrations. A recent episode of Trust Me depicted the main characters draped in the famous fleece. Ellen DeGeneres wore hers on air. The Sunggie infomercial has spawned numerous parodies. My own personal Snuggie has seen Art Galleries, Corporate Offices, Wall Street and a Tavern or three.

Hot on the heels of the Snuggie, is the very similar Slanket. Recent findings have also alerted us to the celebrity endorsed Nuddle, read: Nap and Cuddle. What is the difference really? Who was first? The Slanket or the Snug? According to Slanket.com, the thick fleece blanket was designed in 1998. In the preceding decade it spawned competition in the name of Snuggie. Does it really matter? We here at EGS set out to prove the answer once and for all. Is there a difference? Which is better? Does anyone REALLY care?

Conceived in America

Well this girl cares, enough to take some serious action and find out. I do need to thank the fine folks at both Snuggie and Slanket for hooking us up (Nuddle never did answer our email). Ever since receiving our blankets with sleeves my friends and I have put them through the ringer. We conducted various experiments, and used our skills of deduction so that you, our lovely reader, would have all the info needed when deciding for yourself if you are a Snuggie or Slanket kind of gal.

Both products have distinct marketing plans and target audiences. The Slanket is looking to attract hipsters and 20 something’s. Its website depicts attractive folks lounging in its vast range of cool colors and a tag line which reads “call in sick, its just one day.” The Snuggie and its infamous infomercial clearly thrive on the housewife demographic or the loving grandmother wanting to keep her family warm. And while it is the Snuggie, which aims to please the stereotypical American dream, it is the Slanket that is smart enough to actually offer children’s sizes.

Overall the idea is just ludicrous. No one NEEDS s blanket with sleeves. People have been getting along just fine now for hundreds of years using the plain, old blanket. People were still able to hold their babies, eat a snack and watch TV in absolute comfort, without the use of these silly wizard sleeves. When I first tried on the Snuggie and Slanket I found them both cumbersome, and frankly silly. You back is entirely an afterthought with no form of closure and always susceptible to drafts. Really, why not wear a hoodie? I thought that I would NEVER use this! However, when I started to type this, I can assure you, that I was adorned by one of these fleece marvels. I am thoroughly addicted to it. I sleep with it on. I am cold and powerless without it. What may be the stupidest invention ever, is certainly one of the best ideas.

Slanket vs. Snuggie

So here is my breakdown. If you are uncertain which sleeved blanket you should purchase read below. Choose the activities which are most important to you, and you will have your answer:

If I Were To: Go for a Crisp Evening Walk…. I would wear a Snuggie. It is much shorter than the Slanket, thinner material, and generally easier to get around in. The Slanket really weighs you down, but if you are looking for resistance for that power walk you may have your answer in the Slanket.

If I Were To: Pet my cat…I would opt to wear the Slanket. While both conduct massive amounts of static, the Slanket was much less noticeable. Cat fur really clung to the Snuggie (even after a good washing), and kitty set off sparks every time she rubbed against it.

If I Were To: Have Sex…. I would do it in a Slanket. It is much thicker, and would make a make a better barrier between you and the floor. The Snuggie feels and looks rather cheap and weak compared to the Slanket. The Slanket is warm, sturdy and sure does wash well!

If I Were To: Smoke a Cigarette….I would wear the Slanket. It is so much thicker, that even if you dropped your smoke, it would take twice as long to burn thru the Slanket. And while neither actually caught hold of an open flame, they both quickly started to shrivel up like the ends of my old pointe shoe ribbons. I would not however recommend cooking (or fire jumping) in either of these!

If I Were To: Go Camping…I would bring the Slanket. It is much warmer than the Snuggie, thicker and would be ideal for a cool night in a tent. During the day it would make a big, soft, comfy picnic blanket.

If I Were To: Fly Cross the Atlantic…. I would bring the Snuggie to wear in flight. It is thinner, easier to fold, and would be much more portable, therefore ideal to pack in a carry-on.

If I Were To: Clothe the Homeless…I would give them a Slanket. It consists of much more material. It has both a longer hemline and longer sleeves, and would fit even the largest of men. They could use this as a robe, or a family could even build a tent out of it.

And here we have it… Both products have their pros and cons. Both are too long, and the sleeves are ridiculous, but kitties like both. The Slanket is a better quality, but who can really afford it. If either one was to attach a back closure of sorts it would win hands down. At a price tag of $19.95 for two, Snuggie is the recession era way to keep warm. However the bourgeois had best wrap their luxurious bodies only in a Slanket (which will cost you a mere $37.99). What it all comes down to, is if I had to choose one and only one product to write home about it would be the Slanket.